Hello! I had a very interesting subject on my mind today. Friendship. No, I'm not writing about this because I lost a friend. I'm writing about this because of the many different friends who've made an impact in my life. I suppose most people, when writing about friendship, mainly focus on what true friendship is. That's probably because everyone wants a true friend. Don't you?

If you've had some experience in life, you've probably stumbled upon this question before: Would I rather have one true friend or many average friends? This question strikes at very interesting moments - when a true friend lovingly tells you something negative about yourself, when you see a popular queen-bee surrounded by shallow friends, or when you start looking through your friends list on Facebook! (Believe me, it has happened before)

While I don't have the 100% complete accurate answer, I do believe that a healthy social life should be a well-balanced one. It might be easy for you to get many friends and hard for you to get 'true' friends, or it might be hard for you to get many friends and much harder for you to get 'true' friends. Whichever the case, 'true' friends are certainly hard to find.

One of the primary reasons why they're so hard to find is because they first start off as friends. And not every friend passes the 'true' friend test. Sometimes you're looking, sometimes you're not. Sometimes a true friendship is born out of a challenge, or an opportunity, but mostly the former. 

When I was a teenager (which was not too long ago!), I used to believe that a friend only becomes a true friend when they stick around after the argument and try to work things out. Would you use a criteria like that? Well, it has its pros and cons.

However, life experience has taught me that it's possible to have a deep friendship with people without having to go through a conflict with them. I didn't fight with my friend V, but I shed tears when V had been hit by a drunk driver. I didn't really fight with my friend Y, but we have discussed many topics in length and in breadth. I'm proud to say that I've a good friendship with both. Can you think of similar examples?

What happens when you *do* fight with your friend? Well, the maturity of both parties comes into play at this point. You could be well-meaning, but your actions become horribly misunderstood and misinterpreted by your friend. Ugh. Conflict management. Your friend doesn't want to hear you out and even if he/she did, anything you say is just further proof that you're out to put him/her down. 

I've had a friend like that. I've tried almost everything I can think of. And all of it was sincere, including my apology. But things don't always work out the way you want them to, even if you acknowledge your mistake and apologise for it. Man, that leads to a serious drain on your emotions. I had to struggle with God for it for so long that in the end, I decided that I could do nothing about it but pray for my friend. I don't mean that in a holier-than-thou way! By praying I mean asking God for His Will and blessings to come upon that person's life.

So you have true friends, the ones you fought with and stayed, and the ones you didn't even have to fight with and still...Then you have friends who didn't quite make it to the true friends list - the ones you fought with and lost and the ones I'm about to talk about next.

In my list of MSN groups, I have a group called 'Look here!' - they are the acquaintances/friends I'm interested in. When you meet someone, you probably classify them based on how interesting they are no? One's 'Boring...!' and the other's 'Hmm, this person's cool' and yet another makes you think "Wow...!"

There are just some people you click with upon meeting! I've had a number of clicks myself. I'm sad to say that I didn't follow up on every one of them. I have good reasons though! Maybe you share the same ones when you didn't really follow up yourself. For example:

1. You don't want to send the wrong signal to this person because he/she shows signs of interest

2. You have other things to do - this includes talking to your closer friends who've already been around for ages

3. You're shy because he/she's hot and confident or quite the looker ;)

Ahh friendship is indeed complicated. Just think of the ones you used to be such good friends with, the ones you lost touch with. Don't you miss them? I do. Sometimes I send a message when I think about them. Sometimes I don't. 

All in all, a relationship is about putting in time and effort. I know this universal, timeless principle and I hope you know it too. I'm glad I found my best friend after a long long time. I've had a couple of best friends before and I still have people I consider best friends (This is contradictory because of the definition of best, I know, but still, people like abusing this don't they?);

But this best friend is special. He knows me inside out, He wants to talk to me *whenever* I look Him up and He even sacrificed Himself and all His privileges for me once. I'm still learning how to love this best friend of mine. One thing is for sure though - He's already made all the time and effort for me and now, the ball is in my court.

A best friend who's always there, who's always listening, who's touch can generate a whole spectrum of emotions, who's able to do crazy, unimaginable things for you, who's already given everything up for you, who's indeed the ideal, perfect best friend in everybody's mind. Wouldn't you want a best friend like that? I would.

*Edit*

At this point, I would like to apologise to everyone I haven't caught up with recently. I will drop random text messages again soon, especially if you bothered to read through this. Not to everyone of course! I still have those 3 reasons in place y'know! Thanks for reading! (:

Hello! I had a very interesting subject on my mind today. Friendship. No, I'm not writing about this because I lost a friend. I'm writing about this because of the many different friends who've made an impact in my life. I suppose most people, when writing about friendship, mainly focus on what true friendship is. That's probably because everyone wants a true friend. Don't you?

If you've had some experience in life, you've probably stumbled upon this question before: Would I rather have one true friend or many average friends? This question strikes at very interesting moments - when a true friend lovingly tells you something negative about yourself, when you see a popular queen-bee surrounded by shallow friends, or when you start looking through your friends list on Facebook! (Believe me, it has happened before)

While I don't have the 100% complete accurate answer, I do believe that a healthy social life should be a well-balanced one. It might be easy for you to get many friends and hard for you to get 'true' friends, or it might be hard for you to get many friends and much harder for you to get 'true' friends. Whichever the case, 'true' friends are certainly hard to find.

One of the primary reasons why they're so hard to find is because they first start off as friends. And not every friend passes the 'true' friend test. Sometimes you're looking, sometimes you're not. Sometimes a true friendship is born out of a challenge, or an opportunity, but mostly the former. 

When I was a teenager (which was not too long ago!), I used to believe that a friend only becomes a true friend when they stick around after the argument and try to work things out. Would you use a criteria like that? Well, it has its pros and cons.

However, life experience has taught me that it's possible to have a deep friendship with people without having to go through a conflict with them. I didn't fight with my friend V, but I shed tears when V had been hit by a drunk driver. I didn't really fight with my friend Y, but we have discussed many topics in length and in breadth. I'm proud to say that I've a good friendship with both. Can you think of similar examples?

What happens when you *do* fight with your friend? Well, the maturity of both parties comes into play at this point. You could be well-meaning, but your actions become horribly misunderstood and misinterpreted by your friend. Ugh. Conflict management. Your friend doesn't want to hear you out and even if he/she did, anything you say is just further proof that you're out to put him/her down. 

I've had a friend like that. I've tried almost everything I can think of. And all of it was sincere, including my apology. But things don't always work out the way you want them to, even if you acknowledge your mistake and apologise for it. Man, that leads to a serious drain on your emotions. I had to struggle with God for it for so long that in the end, I decided that I could do nothing about it but pray for my friend. I don't mean that in a holier-than-thou way! By praying I mean asking God for His Will and blessings to come upon that person's life.

So you have true friends, the ones you fought with and stayed, and the ones you didn't even have to fight with and still...Then you have friends who didn't quite make it to the true friends list - the ones you fought with and lost and the ones I'm about to talk about next.

In my list of MSN groups, I have a group called 'Look here!' - they are the acquaintances/friends I'm interested in. When you meet someone, you probably classify them based on how interesting they are no? One's 'Boring...!' and the other's 'Hmm, this person's cool' and yet another makes you think "Wow...!"

There are just some people you click with upon meeting! I've had a number of clicks myself. I'm sad to say that I didn't follow up on every one of them. I have good reasons though! Maybe you share the same ones when you didn't really follow up yourself. For example:

1. You don't want to send the wrong signal to this person because he/she shows signs of interest

2. You have other things to do - this includes talking to your closer friends who've already been around for ages

3. You're shy because he/she's hot and confident or quite the looker ;)

Ahh friendship is indeed complicated. Just think of the ones you used to be such good friends with, the ones you lost touch with. Don't you miss them? I do. Sometimes I send a message when I think about them. Sometimes I don't. 

All in all, a relationship is about putting in time and effort. I know this universal, timeless principle and I hope you know it too. I'm glad I found my best friend after a long long time. I've had a couple of best friends before and I still have people I consider best friends (This is contradictory because of the definition of best, I know, but still, people like abusing this don't they?);

But this best friend is special. He knows me inside out, He wants to talk to me *whenever* I look Him up and He even sacrificed Himself and all His privileges for me once. I'm still learning how to love this best friend of mine. One thing is for sure though - He's already made all the time and effort for me and now, the ball is in my court.

A best friend who's always there, who's always listening, who's touch can generate a whole spectrum of emotions, who's able to do crazy, unimaginable things for you, who's already given everything up for you, who's indeed the ideal, perfect best friend in everybody's mind. Wouldn't you want a best friend like that? I would.

*Edit*

At this point, I would like to apologise to everyone I haven't caught up with recently. I will drop random text messages again soon, especially if you bothered to read through this. Not to everyone of course! I still have those 3 reasons in place y'know! Thanks for reading! (:

hey, this is Jerald